Aries
The voices in your head are real. You are special.
Taurus
Be wary of George this week. MEEEOOW
Gemini
Food poisoning is imminent
Cancer
Listen to Nickelback, you might learn a thing or two
Leo
It’s not imposter syndrome if you’re actually the imposter.
Virgo
Your best friend will be semi-aquatic
Libra
WAKE UP, WAKE UP, WAKE UP
Scorpio
THERE ARE BUGS UNDER YOUR SKIN
Sagittarius
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Capricorn
Times New Roman is the preferred font for APA Style
Aquarius
All of the above
Pisces
Consume Froot Loops to maintain your safety.
