Ask Millie: Conflicted Kate


Dear Millie,

Last week I found out my partner has the inability to perform (sexually). I really like sex so this has been a real bummer. For a while, I really just thought he was shy, but I would go to kiss him and he would turn his head away :(. I could tell he was doing this on purpose because I asked him and he said his breath was really bad. I tried kissing him right after he brushed his teeth and he still did it! Millie, what do I do? We’ve been dating for two years now, I don’t want to lose him!


Conflicted Kate


Dear Conflicted Kate,

You need to have a conversation with him and explain your feelings on the situation and make sure you give a chance for your partner to talk about how they feel as well. Make sure you listen to him and what he has to say.

If he states that he doesn’t ever want to have sex, you need to figure out if you are OK being in a relationship with someone that is not comfortable with intimate physical touch. If you’re not OK with that you may want to re-think your current relationship.

There’s not much you can do to change your partner’s mind about being intimate with each other. You can’t force him to do anything if he doesn’t want to.

Yours truly,