The Nation's Oldest Continuously Published Student Newspaper

The Simpsonian

The Nation's Oldest Continuously Published Student Newspaper

The Simpsonian

The Nation's Oldest Continuously Published Student Newspaper

The Simpsonian

Geer, signing off
Geer, signing off
by Caleb Geer, Ad Manager/Web Editor • April 27, 2024

I didn’t know what the hell I wanted to do with my life when I showed up on campus in the middle of the pandemic almost four years ago. I knew...

Looking back at my time at Simpson
Looking back at my time at Simpson
by Kyle Werner, Managing Editor & Social Media Manager • April 27, 2024

It all started with soup. No, really, let me explain. I was so passionate about the soup in SubConnection as a first year that it caught the...

So long, farewell, I’ve got no more stories to tell
So long, farewell, I’ve got no more stories to tell
by Jenna Prather, Editor-in-chief • April 27, 2024

Unlike my fellow student media seniors who’ve written this before me, I came into Simpson knowing exactly what I wanted to do. I did independent...

A commentary on Halloween costumes

A+commentary+on+Halloween+costumes

Halloween is a time for everyone to dress up and pretend to be children again for a night. While this seems like it would be perfect, it often comes with a lot of issues. Here are my Halloween do’s and don’ts. 

Men have it so easy on Halloween. They put on a flannel shirt, and suddenly they’re the Brawny Man. They put on a jersey, and they become a famous basketball player. They put on a pink shirt and khakis, and they magically become Ken. 

Most women, on the other hand, pop their you-know-what on Halloween. This isn’t to say all women go all out with their Halloween costumes. There are those who take the Mean Girls method of wearing lingerie, adding animal ears, and calling it a costume. Still, at least they planned. 

As we grow up, Halloween costumes either disappear completely from our lives, or become a shell of what they used to be. Part of the issue is money. Now that we have to spend our own money on costumes, they have to be cheaper to fit into our broke-college-student budget. Many try to DIY their costumes to make it easier on their wallets, but unless they are Bob Ross himself, usually you can tell who made their costume. Even so, I appreciate those who take the time to make their own costume over people who throw on a blue hoodie and say they are the “she doesn’t even go here” meme. 

Halloween costumes need to be either clever or quality. As dumb as they usually are, pun costumes work well, but only if everyone gets it. You might think your french toast costume is slaying, but everyone around you thinks you are just toast in a barret. 

The worst costume concept is dressing up as an era. No, not a Taylor Swift era, but a literal decade. Asking someone who they are dressed as, and they respond with, “I’m from the ‘70s!” The funniest part about this costume is the inaccurate stereotype most people try to convey.

Speaking of stereotypes, DON’T APPROPRIATE A CULTURE IN YOUR COSTUME. I cannot believe we still need to have this conversation but don’t dress up as a sombrero-wearing Latino if you are white. Just don’t.

In conclusion, the Halloween costume do’s and don’ts are as follows: Men, try harder without  appropriating.  Women, keep slaying. Everyone, be clever and do what you can to keep costs low. And please, please, think about how your costume could be offensive before you buy it. 

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Kenzie Van Haaften
Kenzie Van Haaften, Staff Reporter

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