Dear Millie,

My girlfriend and I have been together for around three months. We both like watching “Riverdale.” We’re both athletes and enjoy working out together. I could see myself marrying her one day, but we have some major differences. I consider myself to be pretty left leaning with politics and think guns should be better regulated. I think mental health tests should be regularly done. I don’t think any regular person should own a semi-automatic or automatic weapon.

My girlfriend, on the other hand, grew up in a family that regularly hunts. Her dad owns a gun safe, and although I think they are safe with their weapons, it makes me apprehensive. She does not think guns need to be regulated and she wants to have a gun in her future home. I do not want guns in my future home, and I think there are other ways to defend myself. What should I do about this problem? Should I stay with her?

Signed,

Gunless Guy

Dear Gunless Guy,

I’m glad to hear that your relationship is going well other than this particular issue.

I’m sorry to hear that you are struggling with your views on a topic as divisive as gun control. Successful relationships can differ on opinions, and often do.

How you move forward is entirely up to the two of you, but you might want to consider what elements matter to you most in a relationship.

Some people have what they call “deal-breakers” in their relationships with others, and examples could be as small as how their potential partner treats a server to their opinion on reproductive rights or whether or not they want kids. The great thing about deal-breakers is that you get to determine your own.

Consider the things you and your girlfriend currently have in common. It is ideal to share commonalities between partners so you have things to talk about and share with each other.

Additionally, consider what your thoughts would be on her ideal future.

Are guns something you could see yourself one day having in your home? Or are you against having one near you? Does the purpose of the gun matter to you?

If thinking about these questions is giving you major anxiety, it might be worth it to have a conversation with your girlfriend. Try to learn about her perspective and you could explain your own. Tell her where these feelings come from and why you feel the way you do.

If all else fails, this issue might be too much for you to tackle. Perhaps it is better to end your relationship sooner rather than allowing the problem to fester. Only the two of you know the answer.

You may just find she is the Josie to your Archie.

Yours truly,

Millie