Dear Millie,

My boyfriend and I have been arguing about how much time he spends with his ex-girlfriend. I’ve told him I don’t trust her and he shouldn’t be hanging around with his ex-girlfriend. It would be one thing if they hung out in a group together, but often it’s just the two of them. I feel like it’s really weird and makes me feel unsure about our relationship.

He disagrees with me, saying I should trust him and that I’m being too clingy. He thinks I’m being too jealous. He has stated over and over again they’re just friends and I feel like he gets really defensive. I don’t think I’m overreacting. I feel like people shouldn’t hang out with their ex’s, especially if they’re dating someone else. I also think the ex-girlfriend still has feelings for my boyfriend which makes me want them to stop hanging out together even more.

What should I do? I really love my boyfriend and I don’t want this to end our relationship.

Sincerely,

Troubled Love

Dear Troubled Love,

How much do you trust your boyfriend? Relationships only work if both parties trust one another. Do not automatically assume he is cheating on you. You may want to ask around and see if other people know anything more about their relationship. They may be able to shed some light on what is going on. 

If you can’t figure out from other sources I would confront him and flat out ask if he’s been cheating on you. You’ll have to decide if you genuinely believe him if the answer is no. Be careful with your actions. You don’t want to seem like you don’t trust him, but you also don’t want to date a cheater.

Yours truly,

Millie