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Ask Millie: First Date Nerves

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Ask Millie: First Date Nerves

Dear Millie,

I have a first date next week and I’m nervous. I haven’t been on a first date since high school, and I don’t really know how it works anymore. This guy seems really nice, and we get along well, but I’m not sure how it’ll go in person.

Signed,

First Date Nerves

 

Dear First Date Nerves,

First of all, congratulations on setting up your first date! It’s good that you’re putting yourself out of your comfort zone and having a new experience.

I assume the two of you have yet to meet since you mentioned meeting in person for the first time. In that case, I have some basic guideline ideas before you leave for your date.

Give a friend your location of where your date will take place. This should not be necessary, but in our current world, it is better to be safe.

I would recommend going to a public place for your date, it can be a bookstore, a restaurant or coffee shop. Avoid going to a movie, because it is difficult to hold a conversation while watching something. Keep it casual, don’t put too much pressure on yourself.

As far as transportation goes, I would suggest not relying on your date to pick you up. Again, your safety is important.

As you are getting ready, make sure you dress for yourself. Wear something you feel comfortable in. Look into your mirror and remind yourself how awesome you look. You don’t have to wear your fanciest clothes, but you might want to avoid sweatpants unless your date is going to a gym.

Keeping a conversation can be stressful, but you don’t have to come up with every topic. Keep a balance between the two of you.

It is always more exciting to talk when you get to hear about what your date is passionate about. Ask them what their plans are after college, ask them what their favorite activities or pastimes are. If all else fails, talk about Netflix and how crazy the weather is.

On the subject of money, be prepared to at least pay for yourself. Depending on the situation, your date might believe that the person who proposed the date should pay, or the bill should be shared equally. If that’s something you’re comfortable with, you might bring it up before your date.

Lastly, don’t get too ahead of yourself. This is just a first date. Your worth is not based on what this person thinks of you. Let yourself feel comfortable with this uncomfortable situation, it will get easier with time. You’ll find your rhythm with this person.

Or, I suppose you could find out your date’s favorite band is Nickelback, in which case, you’ll find someone else.

Yours truly,

Millie

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