The State of the College address


by Mark Pleiss

For the president, it’s his first 100 days. For colleges, it’s abit different. Students, often like me, wrought and wry from hoursof remorseless study, are eager to evaluate a system bent onevaluating them.

You heard me. The three-week interval has passed. It’s time togive a 2004 report card. Sit down and be quiet Simpson.

And I don’t want any lip.

Enrollment Sizes

Undoubtedly one of the greatest changes this year opposed toyears past is the number of students on campus.

Simpson boasts its record enrollment as a result of fine workfrom our admissions staff. This is true, and the admissions staffis doing exceptionally well. But the school needs to make sureadmissions isn’t doing too good of a job.

Among the various reasons I chose Simpson were the small classesand the overall quaint ambience of the school.

For this, I’m paying $10,000 more.

But as the lines to Pfeiffer get longer and class sizes grow,the quaint ambience diminishes more and more. Simpson must makesure it doesn’t outgrow its size, or its sensibilities in theupcoming years.


A school can build student parking to the moon, and they’llstill be one spot short. To me, the ultimate test is if I can buy aparking pass and always find a spot within reasonable distance ofmy abode. So far, this has always happened. So I say keep up thegood work.

But I’ll have my eye on you.

Student Activities

It has been said that Indianola isn’t exactly a hotbed ofweekend entertainment and debauchery. Perhaps that’s true, but Iremove my hat for those that flood Simpson with exciting (andwholesome) weekend activities.

I’ll begin by saying midnight breakfast may be the greatestthought by Simpson – ever. It brings the campus together in aswirly, alcohol-and-hunger-induced hour of socialization thatscreams what the Simpson commercials sell, “What college issupposed to be.”

Keep it up.

Campus Concert

The fact that Simpson has actually signed a band people haveheard of on campus is great. I know I’ll be in attendance, whetherothers will or not is another question. I just wonder whose agentis going to get fired the day after the show.

Homecoming Theme

I must ask this, “What’s up with our homecoming themes?”

Why does it seem like 49-year-old parents who tell their kids to”get jiggy with it” are writing our homecoming themes?

Mark’s theme ideas:

“Enthusiastic fans leave at halftime,” “Storm beats the hell outof Loras … again,” “October massacre” (that’s a Halloween one),or “Hurricane Simpson” (who says the midwest is safe?).

New Screen on Scoreboard

In a liberal-arts world where athletics is the primary way topersuade men to campus, any new facility or device can help.

In Simpson’s case, the new television screen atop the scoreboardis a great incentive for recruits to become part of the Storm.Having your picture shown to everyone in the stadium (numbers offans may vary) can make anyone feel like a pro.

Good job.


So how are things going? Pretty well. The number of studentsthat want to come here is growing, and I’m having a good timearound campus. There are some wrinkles that can always be ironedout, and a few issues looming in the near future; but that’s allpart of running a college.

Have a good year and cheer on the Storm for homecoming.

Together, we can “get it started.”