I’m straight and have had many boyfriends throughout my life, but with that being said, I still find myself staring at girls more than usual. I’m wondering if it’s possible that I may be a lesbian or maybe bisexual. My parents are strict Christians, and so I’m worried about the outcome. What should I do?
Dear Confused Christian,
It’s perfectly normal to be questioning your sexuality at this point. By now I’m sure men have officially disappointed you more than once, and there are definitely some very attractive girls around campus. There’s nothing wrong with pursuing this particular feeling.
One weekend I went to the Garden, a gay nightclub by downtown Des Moines, and had a blast. When people asked for my sexual orientation, I simply said, “I love everyone.” There was a really fun drag show and a couple of male strippers who were hilarious. I got hit on a lot by women there and felt completely comfortable with it. I even danced with a girl from Chicago all night and exchanged numbers.
I would recommend you go somewhere like the Garden to see how you feel when women hit on you. If you feel comfortable, then I say roll with it. If you don’t feel comfortable, maybe that’s a sign that you’re straight and just appreciate beautiful women. If you do end up pursuing someone from the same sex, just be honest with them and tell them that you are new to it.
As for your parents, it’s really none of their business. If you eventually get into a relationship and want to include them in your family life, then by all means go ahead and break it to them. But if you’re just dabbling in a few gay extra-curriculars, there’s no reason to tell your crazy parents. Don’t even get me started on parents who don’t accept their kid’s sexual orientation.
Word of advice, though, don’t assume that every girl at the club is in fact a lesbian. I was totally grinding with this girl and touching her butt and stuff only to look up and see some guy waving at her. When I asked who that was she replied it was her husband. You’re young, crazy and in college so this is the time to “experiment.” Good luck. Go find yourself some ladies.